|Chubby baby Bailey - so serious!|
It's a question I get asked a lot. I don't mind it. I know most get super annoyed with those types of questions. I'm naturally curious, so I'd be wondering too. Hello! I'm 28 and I have one 8 year old child. What gives?
The answer to that question has changed over the years.
At first, it was obvious. Matt and I began dating when Bailey was only two. The answer then was, "ummm....chill, we're not even married yet and we are in no rush."
During our engagement it was, "we just want to be married for a bit."
Then the answer got fun, "we're trying now!"
Then, not so fun, "still trying, it's taking awhile."
Then it got hard, "we miscarried."
Then even harder, "we're giving it another go, but it just isn't happening."
This song and dance became sad and stressful. My health declined due to a need birth control to balance my hormones since I was 14 thing. I gained weight. I was sick in bed for a third of the month with PMDD symptoms. It hindered my ability to be a mom and wife. It was no fun.
We had a decision to make. Do we go forward with hard core infertility stuff or do we stop?
We chose to stop.
Please note: I have nothing against families who choose infertility treatments, it just wasn't the right choice for us :)
We simply realized we were putting a lot of pressure on something that may just not be in the cards for us. I am a big believer in fate, destiny, the master plan, or whatever you call it. Ours just doesn't include a baby, and I'm okay with that. To be honest, I still haven't figured out if I ever truly wanted a baby, or if I merely felt like it was the obvious next step.
|B's 5th Birthday|
Once we made this decision a huge weight was lifted from my heart. I LOVE being a mother of one. Bailey is the most amazing child I could have ever hoped for. After all, she saved my life.
Of course more questions came with this decision, and I'm okay with answering those too.
Doesn't Matt want a child of his own?
Bailey is, and always has been, his own child. That wasn't a factor.
What if you regret this decision?
We've always talked about adopting. That's always an option in the future ... the way far away future.
Doesn't Bailey need a sibling?
Plenty of people grow up without a sibling and turn out fine. She is already 8, so the chance of her actually playing and growing up with said sibling is pretty slim. My sister and I were 5 years apart, and we didn't get along until we were adults.
|Bailey is 8 and has such cute style!|
We are at peace with our decision. For now, and most likely forever, I will be a mother of ONE amazing child.
Have you ever struggled with infertility?
Are you dying to ask me a question? Have at it. I'm not shy. ;)